"...we shouldn't be angry at the people who use, curse, ridicule, or betray us. Instead, we must pray for them because they might be undergoing something we don't know. They might be deeply wounded or confused or lost."
Many of us are familiar with the itching provocative feeling when a friend or a relative uses us for his/her advantage. I myself have my own fair share of such stories.
I am naturally an expressive and frank person. But there are just those moments when I simply choose to just smile and be silent no matter how hurtful or provoking the circumstance is.
I believe it is God working inside me. It isn't my normal response then--either I talk with the person in private or I would be indifferent because of pride.
I have been betrayed by a close friend when we were in high school. She used my name for her to get what she wanted and even tried to stain my reputation by giving statements that she said was from me. I was totally clueless. Good thing, another friend who knows me so well thought that she was so sure I couldn't be involved in that situation and told me about it. Another instance was when another close friend used my name to cover up her situation. She looks naive and sweet, nobody would ever think that it was really her who did such thing--and with my outgoing, outspoken, extrovert personality, everybody would think it was me who's the suspect.
The particular things they did to me were so provoking that I wanted to confront them flat to their faces. But I opted not to. I didn't know what was going on inside me that I preferred not to defend myself; rather, I chose to just smile, just be silent, and pray for prudence and peace that I urgently need.
Time passed. Now I realized situations of same the nature—provoking, tormenting, hurting, and saddening—happen in our lives so we may appreciate even more the support of our families, who as sure as the sun will rise will emerge and console us; know our true friends; receive the grace of self-discipline; and obtain emotional maturity and strength in character in the midst of torrents of feelings running through our veins.
I learned tonight from a Bible reflection that we shouldn't be angry at the people who use, curse, ridicule, or betray us. Instead, we must pray for them because they might be undergoing something we don't know. They might be deeply wounded or confused or lost.
If we truly want to see ourselves as people who are living upright lives (that we even assess our projected integrity), then we must start from within and take the upward steps of forgiveness and understanding to make it real and meaningful.
Whenever people put you down or pick holes in you, just smile. Forgive even if you don't understand why. In your quiet moment, understanding from heaven will descend upon you. Then, your silence will radiate the peace that you hold and will speak to the heart of the one who hurt you in ways you cannot imagine, because God will work it out for you if you just surrender the situation to Him.
As King David said in 1 Sammuel 16: 11-12 , "Leave him alone; let him curse for the Lord has told him to. It may be that the Lord will see my distress and repay me with good for the cursing I am receiving today."
In Psalm 3:3-5 David says, "You are a shield around me, O Lord; You bestow glory on me and lift up my head. To the Lord I cry aloud, and he answers me from His holy hill. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me."
In Psalm 4:4 David says, "In your anger do not sin; when you are on your beds search your hearts and be silent."