Out With the Old; In With the New

Change comes with time.

Or maybe, time requires change.

Among the things that change over time is how the human race perceive, define, approach, and live life.

Few decades ago, the approach was individualistic. Competition was normal. Being famous and powerful was applauded. Owning mundane things was ideal. Grandstanding was a way of life. Money was the goal because it was thought to have made the world go round. I say so because I observe many older people are like these--a combination of these. They have these distinct characteristics.

At present, people magnify the importance of good health, being kind to oneself and others, inclusive growth, inner peace, living harmoniously with others, freedom over money. Now, money is just a tool, and freedom is the goal--time and financial.

The paradigm shift resulted in the revolutionary mindset and approaches of the new generation, among them are as follows:

-Inner peace is the new success.
-Gratitude is the new asset.
-Energy is the new charm.
-Humility is the new strength.
-Grit is the new strategy.
-Connection is the new attraction.
-Faithfulness is the new sweetness.
-Healthy is the new lifestyle.
-Calm is the new mindset.
-Happiness is the new rich.
-Spirituality is the new wellness.
-Self-mastery and self-respect are the new power.

May this new set of perspectives and ways of doing things work in your favor as you live through this new era--without completely leaving the old ones behind, such as the dignity in hard work and the importance of self-sufficiency and resourcefulness.

Bold

You keep on toiling, go on aiming

You keep your feet moving, forget about living

You realize you’re just where you should be

Because the world you’re standing is itself constantly moving

Even if you stop, the world continues

So why tire yourself to keep up on the same track that everybody is taking

Go break free, get yourself a breakthrough

Trust yourself, like how I trust you

Be bold

Put on that red polka dot dress,

Be your own stylist

Swim against the current,

Enjoy the splash of the raging water on your face

Ride on top of the bus,

See the breathtaking view of the cliff sitting beside the ocean

 

Be brave

Drive the truck,

Be in charge of the wheel

Dive in the ocean,

Be the smallest fish in the vast water

Touch the clouds,

Don’t just dream flying

Let go of the traveled path

Make your own trail

Leave a mark

The world is constantly moving

Sunrise will shower its blessings even if you’re asleep

The sun will set even if you’re not ready

You will never ever stop midnight to crack even if you try

You will just never ever

So be brave.

Be bold.

Be you,

Just the way He sees you

Beautiful, strong, and free

Don’t just be a passenger,

Don’t just be the biggest fish in the aquarium

Go breakfree, get yourself a breakthrough

Live!

Move at your own pace

Don’t be a pushover

Don’t let others’ expectations choke you

Let go of the travelled path

Make your own trail

Leave a mark

See the colors of the world

Savor the tastes of life

Know the faces of love

Leave the safe zone

Meet all the emotions out there

So be brave.

Be bold.

Be you,

Just the way He sees you

Beautiful, strong, and free

But with every breath you take

Breathe love in and out

Live and love

Just live and love

Surely your life will be full

Surely your love will give life to all

I wish I were a musician so I could arrange this poem into a song.J

I made this for a very good and dear friend on her 28th birthday... today! 

Life’s like it! A Mural

Every detail in your life has a reason and purpose, and the story of your life doesn’t end yesterday nor today. Don’t live a boring and unproductive life. Don’t just exist. Live! Paint a good life.

Mural is a large piece of artwork, usually painted on a wall or ceiling, in which the architectural elements of the given space are harmoniously applied into the master piece.

When you stand close to a Mural, you can see the details—the beauty of the skillfully painted intricate details or the imperfections of the strokes and the hues. When look at it a few distance away, you can see the entire picture—the work of art formed by the combination of the plain and elaborate details and of the dark and light colors and the combination of the imperfections.

Life’s like it! A Mural.

When we examine our lives daily, sometimes we don’t see the reason, or we can’t see the purpose, why some things arrive in our lives or certain events happen to us. But whenever we try to step out of and detach ourselves from the situation, we gradually realize the reason why such things or events happen to us.

The mural is the beauty and meaning conceived by the skill, imperfections, dark, and light elements of our lives.

Living our lives daily is like painting the smallest details of our own murals. We have failures, successes, heartbreaks, breakthroughs, disappointments, victories to tell.

Some parts are dark colored, others bright. Some portions are complex, others simple. Some painted on the corners, others on the center. These elements have their own right places and own roles in your life.

Because the mural is so big, some dark parts could mean non-sense when you look at it closely, or some strokes seem out of place. But when you take steps back, you will see how the dark parts harmoniously blend with the light and bright colors and the beauty it adds to the entire piece, or how the senseless strokes magically form the elegant images of the mural.

So whatever the previous years painted in your vast mural, don’t  sneer, they are just part and parcel of the master piece that is not yet complete. Don’t stay content either. For as you live each day, the meaning and beauty of the mural is revealed in half concealing.

You are in control. You hold the brush and the palette. You can always make the entire master piece become the image you envision it to be. Or, if in the middle of the course you have a change of heart, you can always continue and paint your story the way you want it to be.

You always have a story to paint, a life to live.

So jump off your couch. Don’t just analyze and plan. Move and progress, so once your mural is complete, it will tell a beautiful story of your life—just the way you intended to live it.

You are the painter, you are in control. But God gives you the skill and the imagination. So pray for His guidance and wisdom in order for you to interpret well the things that you have just painted (past) and so you will have the skill and genius to continue incorporating in it the right elements (now) to achieve the vision that you want to achieve (future).

You don't have to go far or do grand things in order to make meaning out of your daily lives. Just live—wherever you may be. Be productive. Improve. Keep on learning. Interact with people, including those you see everyday. Make the most of the moment...seize it. Don't hover regretting. Move over growing.

Every detail in your life has a reason and purpose, and the story of your life doesn’t end yesterday nor today.

Do you want a colorful life, a simple life, or an elegant life? Don’t just sit there. Make it!

Life becomes more meaningful when it is lived actively, not passively and safely. When we let ourselves experience and explore the various emotions out there we learn more and appreciate life from a different perspective.

Don’t be restricted by your disappointments yesterday. Break-free and breakthrough!

Don’t be content of your success of the past. Move forward!

Don’t live a boring and unproductive life. Don’t just exist. Live!

Paint a good life.

Happy new year! May you have a colorful year ahead filled with love, joy, good health, prosperity, and victories! Be grateful for every thing that will happen… God has prepared the beautiful story of your life already. You just have to live it!

Managing Stress: Breathe and Start Living

Stress wreaks havoc on our mental, emotional, and physical health. Stress narrows our capability to think clearly, enjoy life, and function effectively. It hampers us in our journey toward our goals.

Time flies so fast!

We are now in the second half of the year. I bet many of us need to reboot or refresh…

In the busy and fast-paced world we are living, stress, burn out, tension, strain are just some of the popular words we hear [and experience] almost everyday, may we be at work, in school, or even at home.

If we are living with high levels of stress, our entire well-being is being put at risk.

Stress wreaks havoc on our mental, emotional, and physical health. Stress narrows our capability to think clearly, enjoy life, and function effectively. It hampers us in our journey toward our goals.

Difficulty is part of life, and this difficulty is the one that makes us feel stressed out. We cannot just shut “difficulty” down or be blind about its presence. The good news is, we can manage it!

Take charge of your stress! Do your best to prevent, reduce, and cope with stress.

The key to enjoy your life in the midst of hustle and bustle? EQUILIBRIUM. A balanced life.

Below are some of the easy-breezy strategies that can help you combat daily stress.

I. Avoid Unnecessary Stress

Managing stress is all about taking charge—of your thoughts, emotions, environment, and your manner of dealing with everyday difficulties.

a. Learn how to say “No”

Identify your limits and work around them. Accepting too much responsibility eats up most of your time and energy. Don’t spread yourself thinly; otherwise, your assets (skills, talents, and good attitude) will become your liabilities because your deliverables would become of less quality, or eventually you feel tired and abused, or your health could suffer.

b. Avoid people who stress you out

Limit the amount of time you spend with your emotional vampires, or those who consistently cause or bring you worry, anxiety, irritation, or complications. If you still cannot prevent them, handle them lightly and don’t allow them get into your nerves by just letting them be and just deal with them diplomatically (like if at work), and do your best to stay focused at what you need to accomplish at that very moment.

c. Take control of your environment

Think ahead. Figure out ways on how to deal with the situations that may arise when scenario A, B, C, or D happens. Don’t push yourself against the stress wall and be stuck, instead, find ways on how to climb it and get to the enjoyable side of life. “Preparation” reduces, if not totally eliminates, stress in every situation.

d. Avoid hot-button topics

If you get easily upset over a certain topic and you often find yourself arguing with people over it, just stop bringing that issue up or simply excuse yourself from the conversation to prevent conflicts that might burn you out.

e. Trim down your to-do list

Know your priorities and schedule your daily tasks accordingly. Distinguish between the “should” and the “musts”; and the “urgent” and the “important. Eliminate the unnecessary tasks. Don’t manage time for it will always be 24 hours a day; instead, manage your tasks efficiently and effectively.

II. Alter the Situation

If you cannot avoid a stressful situation, alter it! Figure out what changes you can do to reduce or prevent stress.

a. Express your feelings

If something or someone is bothering you, communicate your feelings honestly but courteously. Repressing your feelings tends to build up stress and might just complicate the situation. Conversely, opening up reduces your stress.

b. Be willing to compromise

If you want someone to change his attitude or behavior, be willing to meet half-way and change or adjust yours too. That person may also be experiencing something about you that he doesn’t like or agree with. Whether he is the only problem or not, doing your part will help you improve your social skills when learn the art of coping with people having a personality different from yours.

c. Be determined

Delay gratification. If you have something to do, stick to it. Be prepared and focused. If interruptions or distractions come your way, stand your ground by tactfully informing others what you need to finish or by abiding by first-things-first principle.

d. Take quick breaks

Don’t soak yourself in your work. It will not make you the Best Employee in town. Take quick breaks to stretch so blood will circulate well in your body or take a quick snack so your mind can refresh and be able to digest ideas or to release creative juices. During a “toxic” season, avoid overwhelming yourself. Break deliverables into manageable tasks, and do them systematically rather than one-time big time. Committing yourself to tasks that you cannot handle within the day will just affect the quality of your work and your mood.

III. Accept the Stressor and Adapt

Accept the things you cannot change and control. If you cannot control external factors, it’s okay! You can always manage the internal factor—you can choose to do better, feel better, and think better. You can better adapt to stressful situations and regain your sense of control by changing your expectations and your attitude.

a. Don’t force yourself to control the uncontrollable

Forcing yourself to control the uncontrollable (like the weather, the traffic, the mood of your boss, etc) will only create your burn out, and even fan the fire. Focus on the things that you can control and change.

b. Look at the bright side and from the upside

When faced with a problem, don’t focus on its inherent difficulty. Look at it as a good break to shine. Trials are opportunities in work clothes. Once you solve or overcome the problem, it will not only take you closer to your goal but will also reward you with good self-confidence and self-image.

c. Adjust your standard and attitude

Perfectionism is a major source of stress. Don’t be cruel to yourself and to others by expecting perfect results or the best quality of work all the time. Set reasonable and attainable standard for yourself and for others.

IV. Back to Basic

Refresh your outlook and reboot your system by going back to the heart of it all—yourself!

a. Nurture yourself

Dedicate one day a week for a really good rest day. Sleep like a baby. Relax! Do the things you enjoy and love. Have a good time with friends or simply have a “Me-time”. The important thing is you afford yourself a window time to recharge and appreciate your life.

b. Laugh

Keep a good sense of humor. Read funny articles, watch funny movies, or crack jokes with your friends. Loosen up and learn to laugh, even at yourself!

c. Maintain a healthy lifestyle

Exercise regularly to allow your blood to circulate well and to stimulate your brain. Have a healthy diet so you feel  healthy and feel good about yourself. Get a good sleep.

Remember, life is a gift to be enjoyed and shared with your loved ones.

Take care of yourself and live a balanced life!

Accelerate: Go. Grow. Glow.

Accelerate your life. Constantly go to God and surely you will continuously grow in every area of your life and the people around you will see the glow in your heart.

Exhausted. Empty. Crushed. Confused. Broke. Insecure. Hopeless. Life is difficult!

.

Heavy words? Not anymore!

Now that we have encountered Jesus, we know that when we are being emptied it is because God wants to fill us with new and better blessings and when we are stretched, He just wants us to grow. So now, when life throws us dirt it’s okay. We simply shake it off, shake it off, and shake it off; and use it as a platform to step upon until we emerge victorious.

We are living in an era and area where almost everything is instant, where people are mobile, and where the demands and dynamics of daily life have evolved with time. At one point, we have become slaves of our work, unhealthy relationships, financial incapacity, family issues, personal insecurities, or other problems that dry our spirits.

We have become stray, hungry souls in the modern jungle of glass-and-steel skyscrapers of the present world.

Walking down the memory lane, our experiences a month, a year or years ago may bring pinch on our hearts, deep breaths, or tears in the corner of our eyes.

Thanks to our merciful and gracious Father Lord God, He called us in ways and times unexpected to give us new and better lives for us to do good and enjoy blessed lives. (He saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. ~ Titus 3:5)

Through our transformation, the jungle turned into a mecca of love, care, and enlightenment that propelled us to do our best to become obedient to God’s word, to have better relationships at work and at home, and to be channels of God’s blessings wherever we go.

We now have new and better perspective about life and reinforced Christian values.

Breakfree! Move forward!

Whether by responding to a friend’s invitation, reconnecting with God due to necessity, or personally choosing to renew personal relationship with God, it is by no accident that we are transformed. We were all hand-picked by God and are now renewed in spirit and heart. It’s just up to us how we will remain in Him.

We are all works in progress!

Embrace your potential not your past. (But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, ~ Philippians 3:13).

“Your past does not define you. God can take all your imperfections, so don’t stay there,” shared by Randy Borromeo.

Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Remember the old days—what you were thinking of and how you were feeling.

Look at yourself now! People may know your transformation, but only you can truly tell how your life has changed. Perhaps, you have already moved forward and are now aware of your bigger and brighter life ahead.

When we listen to God’s word and make good use of our blessings—time, talent, and treasure—we feed our souls and nurture our life in general.

Accelerate your life. Constantly go to God and surely you will continuously grow in every area of your life and the people around you will see the glow in your heart.

Be Jesus’ torch-bearer. Listen to His voice. Respond to God’s call and reflect the light of Jesus’ wherever you go.

Accelerate your life! Move onward and upward.

 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. ~ Jeremiah 29:11

Spotting The Lighthouse: Clear About Your Desired Destination

Know what you want. Live up to your clear vision and work your way right through it. People are drawn to leaders who have compelling vision and help others forge their own visions, and who help others help themselves.

Growing old and growing up is much like commanding a ship through the vast ocean of life.

As we set out—to drift around or to purposely achieve our goals—our actions and decisions affect the lives of those who are on-board our ship (our families, friends, and even the strangers we meet somewhere). Our every action has ripple implications on the lives of others, whether we know it or not.

This power to affect others is what makes us an influencer, a leader, whether we like it or not.

Being a leader, we need to be clear about our visions and press on them no matter what; in the same way a ship captain needs to be clear about his destination and sail towards the flickering lighthouse, stormy or sunny.

We don’t need an official title, a crown, a salary, a cloak, or a badge to think of ourselves as real leaders or, subtly put, influencers.

A brother or sister who takes care of his/her other siblings is a leader. A teacher is a leader to her students. A traffic enforcer is a leader to a crossing pedestrian. And the most noble of all leaders, a parent who leads his/her family every single day.

You are a leader! When you decide to lead your own self to your new and better self, you are a leader.

When others see your transformation, these people who also want to become better naturally gravitate towards you.

Wisdom of Proverbs 29:18 says, “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” On the contrary, no one can stop someone who is clear about what he wants. People follow leaders who know exactly what they want.

In sailing through this life, we need people for various reasons: to help us adjust the sails when we get out of focus; to talk to when we feel crazy; to man the bridge when we have to take a break, among other things. When we dock for some pit stop, we need to deal with strangers or some new friends.

Simply put, whatever we do and wherever we go, we will be dealing with people and build relationship with them. The way we connect and relate with them could make or break our journey towards our destination, our goal.

Hence, before we set out for any destination or goal, it is very important that we prepare for the journey. Be clear on where you exactly want to go and when exactly you want to get there.

Some of our plans may be dispensable. But planning per se is indispensable if we are to precisely know our direction; get to our destination efficiently; overcome unexpected storms; to be responsive to emergency calls; and arrive at our port of destination safely.

Sail prepared and with clarity of vision.

Before pulling the anchor, we must know where the lighthouse is so we have a clear reference point of our destination as we sail off the coast.

To have clarity [in our lives], we need to remember and live up to three important things:

First, be clear about your vision (the what). Know exactly what you want. An effective leader is clear about his vision. If you don’t cast a clear picture of your future, you will be fixated on your past. God can take away your imperfections, so don’t stay there.

Second, be clear about your values (the why). Have your values intact. If you want to win the fight against temptation, you have to decide to win long before it arrives. Decision-making is hard only when you’re not clear about what is most important to you.

Third, be clear about your vehicle (the how). Show people how to do things right. Lead others by example. Live up to your clear vision and work your way right through it. People are drawn to leaders who have compelling vision and help others forge their own visions, and who help others help themselves.

If you are clear about your vision, values, and vehicle, people will naturally follow you.

Know what you want! You can be whoever you want to be. You can go wherever you want to go.

Be clear. Remember, failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

As you begin you journey the challenge is, will you be a good influencer/leader to the people around you?

Thinking Out Loud in My Boudoir: Escaping Reality

This will always be the reality and you can never escape it: you are in charge of your choices (mind) and your happiness (heart). Freedom is a gift. Reality is a guide. Do not escape freedom and reality.

When we were kids we wanted to grow old and assume responsibility, we were curious about a lot of things and wanted to try them.

Now that we are adults, we want to be like children—consciously or unconsciously. We want to be stress-free, problem-free. We want to be free from responsibility.

I remember just a little over the death of my father, my perspective of a lot of things changed and I started to become aware of many things, perhaps necessity dictated and demanded. I believe that was the first turning point of my life, and my “official growing up” was way too early, or so I believe.

Part of my new perspective then was that I should be grateful and excited when I recognize I have a trial. When I feel uncomfortable—pain, difficulty, negative emotion—I thought I had new things to be thankful for and to look forward to. I have new things to learn.

When I was a kid, trials or challenges or problems meant new experiences, new lessons, and wisdom.

As I (we) grow older, we think we have had learned more than enough about life, that we are better equipped after all the various experiences we have gone through in life. So we stop being interested about life and we start avoiding pains and stress brought by problems thinking we've had more than enough.

Little do we know that our knowledge of things, our mind map of our lives and our future, needs constant revision, and sometimes major revisions.

We all know that growth—in any area or aspect of our lives—requires pains and taking responsibility as we face our problems. Yet, most of us we ignore this obvious fact. As a result, we avoid responsibility and suffering.

What we don't realize is by avoiding responsibility and suffering, we either let our problems grow as we hide them and deny them, thinking they naturally go away; or we let others handle them for us.

By doing so, we either unconsciously pet our problem like growing a monster we're too scared of or we give away our liberty and control to decide for ourselves. Consequently, either way, we keep our problem and we hamper our own growth.

As adults faced with problems, we tell ourselves now:
1. It's all my fault, but I'm tired of this. I will let it be, anyway all this shall come to pass. (Blaming oneself)
2. It's his/her/their/this world's fault. I have no control over them. Why should I bother myself with his/her/its mess. The heck I care. (Blaming the world)

If we will not take the time to look at things or situations, we will not be able to identify the source of the problem and the significant problem we need to solve.

With our era, where everything is fast paced and new information is available everyday, we must be willing and deliberate in equipping ourselves with skills and knowledge to be able to keep up with time and grow with it.

Let us engage ourselves with our peers. Observe and learn from others.

Most importantly, nurture our relationship with our very own selves. Let us take the time to know ourselves better—skills, weaknesses, strengths, potentials.

Let's live in the now. Face reality. Take accountability. Embrace and accept ourselves. Know, feel, and believe that we are valuable whether people around us perceive us as such or not.

One day we will be surprised, solving life's trials and managing our time for pain and pleasure becomes natural and easy for us. What will be more surprising is, we will naturally become more grateful, blessing expert, and happy persons.

When we know in our deepest fiber that we are valuable, then we start realizing our need for constant growth and the importance of taking hold of our freedom to choose and decide for ourselves are both indispensable parts of having a good life.

And the result?

We become more willing to experience pain and we become more open to new things because we know that through them we become capable of understanding and helping ourselves, and it's ripple effect is we become resilient, understanding of others, generous, and happier than ever... All because we grow and refresh our perspective.

There will always be people and situations that will make our lives difficult, and that's the reality. Our pains or discomfort will always be part of our lives as long as we breathe. Hence, we need to constantly recognize those which are necessary problems and unnecessary ones.

To do that, we must take time to spot the source of the problem; make ourselves comfortable with it; take reasonable time to study the necessary problem; focus; solve it; and learn from it.

Know you are no longer a child totally dependent, helpless, and problem-free.

Live and act your age. Enjoy your independence in deciding for yourself and utilize your control over whatever consequence your decision may breed—painful or joyful. Take responsibility.

Nonetheless, balance your life by acting your age yet enjoying that childlike gratitude, zeal about life, and courage.

This will always be the reality and you can never escape it: you are in charge of your choices (mind) and your happiness (heart).

Freedom is a gift. Reality is a guide. Do not escape reality and freedom.

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Thinking Out Loud in my Boudoir is a column for some of my random thoughts that, perhaps, other ladies my age are also experiencing or thinking of—whether from same vantage point or another. Or maybe, just maybe, it’s just my own voice reverberating in my own world. I will do my best to discriminate my reason in this column, and just write spontaneously the first things and thoughts that a normal lady could think of. Just writing as I think...

Prisoner

We were young and free

Enjoying our burgeoning

You held my heart

Gently you stole it from me

I didn’t see it, I didn’t see it

Til I noticed

You took me wherever you wanted to go

Never letting me go

Now I was a prisnoner

A prisoner of your love

Your cell was the best place

I myself didn’t wanna go

I wanna be a prisoner

A prisoner of your love

We were young and free

Enjoying the spring time of our lives

You walked into my life

I didn’t see it, I didn’t see it

Til I felt you running
Running in my head

And thumping my heart so fast

You locked yourself up

Threw the key

Never leaving

Never stopped thumping my heart so fast

You were a prisoner

A prisoner of my love

I woke up one day

Still a prisoner of your love

The cell I didn’t imagine this way

Sometimes it’s cold

I laid on the ground alone

Waiting for your gentle arms

Wrapping them around me

Sometimes it’s too small

I stayed on the corner

Sharing the chamber

With two or three more

I woke up one day

Still a prisoner

Now finding the door unlocked

Hesitating, stumbling

Hesitating, crying

I myself didn’t wanna go

I wanna be a prisoner

A prisoner of your love

I woke up one day

Still a prisoner

Now finding the door unlocked

But it was still the best place

I myself didn’t wanna go

I wanna be a prisoner

A prisoner of your love

You still take me wherever you wanted to go

Still never letting me go

Told myself,

I’m in cold, I’m in crowded

Cold and crowded cell of your love

I remembered the days

We were young and free

Now, when I wake up

I remember those days

When I was still a prisoner

A prisoner in your cold, crowded cell

I should thank you

Thank you for making it cold and crowded

It led me back to freedom

Freedom I couldn’t have relished again

The juvenile is now free

Free again

Enjoying the time of my life

Enjoying the time of my life

Like never been before

Thank you for making it cold

Thank you for making it crowded

I’m now enjoying the time of my life

Enjoying the time of my life

Like never been before




Just a simple February art :-) I noticed I haven't written any poem for quite a while. I wish I were a  musician so I could arrange it myself and sing it after saying, "hit it!"