Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Greeting and a thank-you letter to the sweetest man…

Thank you pa for marrying a woman who is strong-willed, independent, and responsible. If you only saw how hard it was for her to raise us up alone, yet successfully braved her way through every financial, emotion, and physical trials, you would be proud of your taste and choice. Giving up nor becoming selfish was never her choice.



1948 ...

You were born shortly after World War 2. I was not surprised why you were named Dulcisimo, and much more, I was not surprised you didn't like it, but learned to love and live your name--very very sweet.

You were really such a sweet, caring, and thoughtful papa.

Thank you pa for letting me experience how it was to have a loving father and witness how a loving husband treated his wife—you followed the trail of mama's cluttered stuff and picked them one by one, engaged her in loving plants and pets, and called her attention when she was getting unbecoming to her parents and siblings.

Thank you papa for the memories we shared in that red-white BonBon folding bed, where we usually hung out—we squeezed ourselves together as I sucked my feeding bottle while pulling the hair of your armpit or pulling your earlobe and you, if not flipping the photo album (which by the way you loved doing because you were proud of the photo captions you made using the cumbersome typewriter), you tell me your teenage stories or stories about work.

I so love and miss those times... Through our frequent conversations I learned a lot and I gained some 'kumpares' and 'kumares' at the age of three.

I remember how you would correct me whenever I called the other treasures, auditors, politicians 'pare' and 'kumay'.

Of the many things you taught me, one thing that stood out most is when you uttered the words "value relationships, especially friendships because a harmonious and love-filled relationship starts from genuine friendship. Nothing, even money or jewels, can replace genuine friends in times of storms and be as genuine to them." I remember in my public speaking class in high school, I even used your words as my springboard for my speech. That’s how proud I am of you.

Thank you for being a doer of what you preached... Your actions made me believe your words, that they're so deeply engraved in my memory that even I was just 3, 4, 5...10 then, until now I vividly remember many of your applied examples. By that, I have become a believer of actions rather than of just plain words and I struggle to be like you. (or both a speaker and a doer, the environment you and mama exposed me to just made me talkative and verbose, or perhaps it was the pig's 'pie' which made me like this).

Thank you for making yourself a wise man... I mean for choosing the right woman to love. When you left your physical body, the 'mama-papa' you left us consistently performs her role responsibly...and even goes beyond it selflessly.

Thank you pa for falling in love with a woman who is funny, playful, and witty... Our home becomes alive when she cracks jokes or hit us with her 'pilosopo' remarks. It's not boring when she's in the mood.

Although I'm wondering pa how you dealt with this woman’s pride, volatility, and messiness. But I thank you for balancing her personality with yours. Since you went home to Him she gradually learned to be yielding, pleasant, cool-headed, and organized (in her own amusing way).

Thank you pa for marrying a woman who is strong-willed, independent, and responsible. If you only saw how hard it was for her to raise us up alone, yet successfully braved her way through every financial, emotion, and physical trial, you would be proud of your taste and choice. Moreover, giving up nor becoming selfish was never her option.

One thing I'm not sure if you would be glad, though—seeing her perform in front of a big crowd dancing. Or perhaps you'd laugh you lungs out as you cheer her then hug her after and treat her to a good dinner because you know how much effortful it is for her to coordinate her right foot with the left.

Thank God, you were a varsity player pa, Boyet wins in international motocross competitions; you were a dancer and singer and student leader, Ken-ken wins in performing arts contests and follows your heart for service even though he was just 3 when you left us...thank God your blood is strong pa. You’d be proud seeing them in the podium receiving awards. But you’d be prouder knowing how mama raised us while mama make her own achievements.

Nonetheless, so much thanks to God that the only woman you chose to live with until your very last breath provided us with all the things we needed—tough love, tough love, tough love, and sweet love.

For through her tough love during our formation stages, we were taught how to survive and stand on our own feet as she silently provided us what we needed, making us believe that we were the ones who made all things happen, but it was really her at our backs pushing us while playing another role beside us challenging us that we couldn't do things well, then go behind again pushing us. I can never forget her tough love to me...then balancing it with her funny side (and yes her classic funny antics), and garnishing it with her natural motherly soft-heart covered with caramelized sugar to project her hard sweetness. She knows pretty well her timing when to punish and to reward.

Now that she's convinced that we, your kids, are worthy of her trust and have already proven to her some little things, she's more our barkada than our police... For me, even though she's imperfect, her imperfections are just so right to qualify her as the most wonderful mama we can ever have! Nothing beats her pa, nothing!

Thank you very much pa!

Your presence pa, i don't know but i just think of it this way, has been compromised to make 4 persons become even better and set big goals for their lives... The difficulty associated with your absence made us know God more and become obedient to ma (even though she doesn't feel mine compared with my brothers). Pa, some of mama’s traits are finding their way out now… mama and I have almost the same attitude...don't worry, she knows what I will do next, she knows I will not fail her because I love her. There are just many ways in skinning a cat, sometimes (come closer pa, I'm sure it's also mama's excuse sometimes shhhh...)

We're so lucky you left us with a valuable, priceless treasure... A selfless loving mama who willingly performs her role as 'mama-papa' and whose only desire is for us to become the best persons that we can ever be, even though she's just one supporting your three musketeers.

One of the many things that make me take my hat off is how your beloved woman makes us feel there's nothing lacking in the family and that we're even in a better boat than other children with both parents present.

I was even shocked with my friend's response pa when I shared with her about our family... She complimented your queen and said "I'm amazed how your mom brought you up for not being envious with others who have both parents. You're lucky you have a great mother." Only then I consciously affirmed that, "Yes, honestly I am never envious of other kids for having a great family... I admire them, but I am never envious."

Probably because I had a very good papa and have a great mama!

Now that your babies have already grown up pa, including your queen, our memories of you remain alive and forever will be. For as long as I live, you will live in my heart, in my mind, and in my actions. I never disregard you in discussions about families, besides, I'm always proud of you.

I promise to be always your 'little soldier' who will protect our family, including all the things you left behind—lola, your sibs, your teachings, your dreams for us. Your personal dream of becoming a priest even becomes the double adhesive tape between me and God no matter how playful I have become.

It's so amazing pa how we were able to discuss some of the good stuff, that are timely and prceless, when I was a kid... I though they were just another story-telling, but a life-saving instead.

Our other stories, let's continue them in my dream pa...!

Happy birthday papa! I hope you were here, but I'm happy knowing you're with God already feasting and celebrating everyday.

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